Mira Silverwood

20 Reasons Older Men Are Opting for Extended Bachelorhood

Being a single man while entering the golden years of life often attracts criticism. People often assume that bachelors are lonely and unfulfilled, especially if they are over a certain age. But nowadays, more older men than ever are choosing to forgo romantic relationships. Here are 20 reasons why extended bachelorhood is the newest retirement trend. 

Cherishing Their Alone Time

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There’s a common misconception that solitude equates to loneliness, but as we age, alone time becomes more peaceful. After decades of caring for children and sharing their space with others, many older men are basking in solitude. 

Wanting a Simpler Life

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Relationships are often wonderful, but they can make aspects of our lives more complicated. Retirement is the perfect time to embrace a simpler life, as work stress is no longer a concern. With this in mind, many older men avoid romantic pursuits to keep their lives simple and carefree. 

Overwhelmed by the Online Dating World

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These days, the dating world is becoming increasingly digitalized, with countless apps and websites to test compatibility. For older men, meeting someone online can be daunting, especially if they aren’t sure how to use the apps themselves. While mobility issues might prevent them from traditionally meeting people, they are often unwilling to improve their tech-saviness

Struggling to Find a Compatible Partner 

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As we age, we naturally become more set in our ways, and this can lead to difficulties in finding a suitable romantic partner. For two people to be compatible, they must share each other’s life philosophy, goals, communication style, and much more. Many older men struggle to find someone who accepts them just as they are, without trying to change their ingrained personality traits. 

They Value Personal Space

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Adulthood rarely comes with adequate personal space, with children, pets, and work colleagues at every turn. While this can be immensely rewarding, many retirees want to enjoy their newfound personal space. For older men, having a new partner move into their space can feel stifling.

Preserving Their Legacy

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Another part of getting older is legacy protection, contemplating what we’ll leave behind for both our families and future generations. For many retired men, the desire to focus on self-improvement and make their mark on the world takes priority over finding love.

They Fear Opening Up

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Concerns about being rejected and judged for our flaws or past behaviors only increase as we age. Many older men fear opening up to someone new, worrying that they come with “too much baggage” and that vulnerability will only lead to rejection. 

They’ve Lost a Spouse

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Sadly, it’s common for a spouse or loved one to pass away before their time, and the grief this brings stops many older people from forming new relationships. Older men who have lost a spouse would rather preserve their memory and stay single, rather than date someone new. 

Preserving Energy

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Many studies show that as we get older, our energy depletes, and this is true for both women and men. Even the best relationships require a lot of energy, whether it’s in the bedroom, or simple day-to-day communication. Many older men would rather focus their energy on other pursuits, such as exercise, hobbies, or traveling. 

Diminishing Confidence

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From self-perceived ageism to health issues and a changing appearance, older men lose confidence for various reasons. This diminishing self-esteem can make it harder to start dating. They might feel they have little to offer a partner, which can lead to them staying single.

They’ve Been Hurt Before

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Whether they’ve gone through a divorce, had a partner pass away, or they’ve experienced romantic turmoil in the past, many older people carry emotional scars. The fear of being hurt again puts many older men off pursuing a new relationship. They simply don’t want to risk the heartache. 

Health Issues

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Retirement brings the unfortunate likelihood of developing health issues, both mental and physical. Older men with health obstacles are less likely to start dating, as they don’t want to become a burden. 

Prioritizing Mental Health

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Mental health becomes a priority for many men as they age, especially with increasing awareness of psychological well-being. The shift towards self-care and personal growth can leave little room for the world of dating. 

Financial Independence 

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A new partnership, however fulfilling,  can come with financial repercussions that threaten someone’s economic independence. For many older men, the fear of sacrificing their hard-earned savings can dissuade them from romantic endeavors. 

Cultural Shifts

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In recent years, the traditional philosophies surrounding relationships have changed. Men were once criticized for staying single, but this independence is now celebrated. These days, many older men are taking advantage of these cultural shifts, and aren’t feeling the pressure to pursue a relationship. 

Avoiding Stress

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Retirement is a time for avoiding stress and embracing the slow pace of our golden years. But dating as a retiree can be stressful, as both parties need to accommodate the other’s established routines. Many older men choose to stay single and avoid these worries. 

Wanting to Travel

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Many people who didn’t get to see the world in their youth do so in their retirement, with more money and life experience behind them. With more older men prioritizing long-term travel, romantic pursuits fall by the wayside. 

Fewer Responsibilities

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Adulthood is responsibility-heavy, with finances, home security, and taking care of children as constant priorities. In their retirement years, many older men are choosing to enjoy a responsibility-free lifestyle. Being in a relationship means you’re often responsible for another’s emotional needs, and many retirees wish to avoid this. 

Focusing on Health

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Prioritizing our physical as well as mental health is important as we age, and many older men dedicate time to maintaining their physique. From working out to outdoor pursuits, maintaining their physical health can be time-consuming, and leave minimal time for exploring relationships. 

Prioritizing Friendships

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Over their lifetime, most older people have amassed a core group of friends, and retirement allows them to spend quality time together. As such, many older men pour their time and energy into maintaining these connections. By prioritizing friendships, they’re more likely to stay single as they already have the companionship they need. 

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